Jake: "How will I be an asset to the company?"
Tyler: Kindling for the ovens. Kindling for the ovens!
CJ: Apparently, staying hydrated can offset RLS symptoms. Which makes sense causing I've been slacking in my water intake lately.
Ross: I've been slacking in your water too!
The house is kinda messy. If only I had a wife to clean it up.
*Holds up left hand*
WHY AREN’T YOU DOING YOUR JOB?
Oh. Wait.
*Holds up right hand*
I didn’t want you to find out like this..
beardofcastro:
“Well, I could tell you what I did to the mic stand, or I could show you what’s left on the drill bit.” #crazyshitRosssays #crazyshitRossdoes #Ross (Taken with Instagram at ShadeLite workshop)
CJ: Dude if someone got me a hooker for my birthday, that would rule.
Ross: Yeah that's not gonna happen. I mean, I would get you one, but it wouldn't make it to you. Or it'd be cold.
Luke: "Hey where's that hooker?" "Oh I think there's some leftovers in the fridge."
It’s one of those fast songs where it has no redeeming qualities. Unless being fast is a redeeming quality. But that’s just women at night. That’s a slut joke. And a me being a sad little man joke. I’m just kidding, I’m not a little man. Unless you count my penis. Alright I’m out of curve balls. Except for the two in my pants. I didn’t know that last one was coming. That’s what she said.
I’m working on a vagina ninja line. Something about going in and out undetected.
I stare too much on campus. I had to stop driving through campus because of it. Because I would wreck……a lot of vagina.
If by care you mean intercourse, then I care deeply. Like 3-5 inches.
CJ: I'm gonna get a cat.
Ross: If you bring that pussy over here, I will destroy it.